Before Turning The Blog On Himself

Photography blogs are boring and make me want to go on a terrible spree. Welcome to the antidote.

AAAAAARGH

Ridiculous.

Utterly, utterly ridiculous. What was the last thing I said to you? I think it was something along the lines of how these blog updates will be significantly more timely and frequent.

I promised you all that I was going to hammer out blog posts until you could build a house out of them. If the letters were bricks and the punctuation acted as mortar, for example. No wait, it’d be better the other way around. Maybe. Anyway shut up, here’s a chevron for the roof >

Ridiculous.

I have no excuse but I have happy reasons for being absent for so long: I’ve been incredibly busy, and it turns out that when you are incredibly busy you forget to write a blog.

Here’s the thing : I am not what people with a penchant for bastardising an already perfectly working language would call “a starter-finisher”. For example, did you know that, midway through typing this sentence, I got up and walked away to clip my fingernails, only to return halfway through clipping them to complete this sentence telling you that I did that? Exactly. Like a fucking housefly, specifically those big, mad ones that batter their stupid faces into every surface they can see until they eventually perish on your windowsill.

That sums up my creative process perfectly, actually.

Here’s a brief and succinct update, then, of everything that’s been going on (yes I’m going to bullet point now):

* I have been getting on with my e-photobook project a bit (but not as much as I should be).

* I have been going all over the country with a new, regular corporate photo gig I have gotten hold of and have been very busy, which is great because it means I can spoil my daughter this Christmas with toys bigger than her entire body.

* I have been ill thanks to the horrific superstrains of virus the little lady brings back from nursery; a terrifying combination of about nine children’s flu symptoms joined together, like that bit in Power Rangers where they all form to make a massive robot. Except with snot.

* Some other stuff happened but I can’t remember what it was.

Alright Come On, Let’s Hurry This Along. What Has Happened Of Significance Since The Last Post?

In short, I feel much more settled. I have struggled to come to terms with the structureless nature of freelance work for a while now. We are so locked in to the idea of weekends that I found it incredibly difficult to have a day off on, say, a Wednesday because I knew I would be working Saturday and Sunday, for example. Well things have really taken off on the commissions front as of late, and I can now properly separate my work into distinct categories. It gives me just enough structure to be happy, basically, and allows me to attribute a sense of purpose to each photo assignment I undertake. And that’s cool.

Oh Hooray and Praise Be I’m So Happy For You Now Shut Up You Solipsistic Bore And Show Me Loads Of Photos

Sorry. Also I am sorry for leaving it so long. I have a post I want to write and THIS TIME I genuinely, actually PROMISE that I will write it and have it up here much more quickly than last time. It’s a case of “I’ll believe it when I see it”, I know, but just wait (a short time) and see.

RIGHT, here you go, kids – a massive photo poo is about to drop, so put some disposable gloves on and pick your way through THIS. The photo poo consists of various magazine shoots, a metal gig, coverage of the official inaugural Mount Your Friends UK tournament and some dickabout portrait sessions that I undertook for a chuckle. I’m going to mostly leave out the corporate shoots I have been doing because they’re not the most blindingly exciting images.

Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed yourself. This is what I thought of it - https://vine.co/v/hTY1AHZXt1d

One comment on “AAAAAARGH

  1. photoblogsareboring
    November 14, 2013

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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This entry was posted on November 14, 2013 by .

Idiotic Twitter Ramblings

About this man and his words

Gareth Dutton thinks photography blogs are boring. He's trying to write one that isn't and it's going horribly. Still, it's nice to know he's alive and well and hasn't gotten himself lost in some awful place, like a terrible evil well made out of the souls of the departed or something.

If you like looking at photos, you might want to go to www.garethdutton.com

Because there are photos there. That he took. I took. It's me, writing in the third person.

Images from Flickr - The home of baseless praise











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